Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban have recently been blessed with a beautiful little girl and I am so happy for them. I always had this feeling, rightly or wrongly, that Kidman was a just a bit screwed in the divorce from Tom Cruise and am so happy she finally had the chance to have a child of her own with a man she so clearly adores.

That being said, Nicole, get a grip. Nicole and Keith are clearly ecstatic with their baby Sunday school, Sunday clothes, whatever her name is and want to show her around Sydney, Australia. Yet they are being harassed by people longing to see the baby.

“Keith and I are just appealing to the press and stuff to give us a little space so we can walk around Sydney and show the baby our town. Just a little bit because she’s tiny, she’s not a doll, she’s a real little thing. Just not right in our face or her face because it’s scary for her, she’s tiny. A tiny little thing.”

You know, I’m not ashamed to say that I’m not tiny, not in the slightest, and I’m a little afraid. Afraid of Nicole Kidman! That being said, she has a point, but a point not exclusive to celebrity babies. I’ve had 3 of them myself, of the uncelebrity variety, and I know how the little old ladies at Alberton’s can be. Had they cameras it would have been that much worse!!

As Keith asked, “Sometimes when people come right up in your face and you think: ‘Good God, would you do that to anybody else’s child?’ That’s all.” I say yes, why yes they would. As a woman berated me while I was shopping with 6, count ‘em 6 (not all of them mine) children for watermelons “Can’t you make ‘em wear sunglasses???” I can attest that strangers see a baby as the ticket to interfere.

Some of this attention is positive though delaying. The sweet little old lady wondering “Oh where did he get his hair from?” After 58 times hearing this very question I fought the urge to say, “that mysterious guy in the bar restroom.” I can understand that if were they ready with camera equipment it would have been all that more nightmarish.

So to the Kidman/Urban family I say, yes you do want them to go away, no you are not all that special, but I do understand why a 40 something with a rubber forehead, a weird short guy with make up and a superhumanly cute baby would attract some attention. I know they ought to go away, but this is your right of passage into parenthood, the presence of cameras the passage to celebrity parenthood.

Vaio con Dios

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